The Christmas Planchette Seance

“I can’t believe we’re doing this.” Dave Peterson said as his family sat around the Ouija Board in the candlelit living room of their manor. “Simon’s going to kill us.”

“If the vicar bothers us, leave him to me.” Terome said.

“Ok,” Dave said, dreading to think what Terome would do if left with the parish priest. Or anyone for that matter.

“Now then, without further adue, let’s begin.” Terome said, placing his hand on the Planchette.

“This is ridiculous.” Dave said.

“You may think that now, but trust me, once we’re done you will believe the unbelievable.” Terome said.

“Yeah. We’ll see about that.” Dave said.

Terome concentrated on the board. “Is there anybody there?” Terome asked.

The Planchette began to move by itself under Terome’s hand. Sarah, Esmeralda, Will, and Eleanor gasped in awe. Dave rolled his eyes.

“Oh, come on. He’s clearly moving that himself.” Dave said.

“Be quiet, dear.” Sarah said. “You’re not helping.”

Dave sulked as the Planchette pointed towards the word “yes” on the board.

“Who are you? Male or female?” Terome said.

“Or any other gender.” Eleanor said.

“No, I’m pretty sure they’re either male or female. It’s only more recently that the concept of gender has been blown out of proportion.” Terome said.

“You can’t be sure.” Eleanor said.

Terome scowled as the Planchette moved. “Quick, get a pen and paper and write down what the spirit is saying.”

“Why don’t you stop holding the thing and see if it moves by itself?” Dave said.

“It won’t work if I do that.” Terome said.

“Oh really?” Dave said. “Why would that be?”

Terome did not respond. The Planchette had spelt out the word “female.”

“There, told you.” Terome said. “Now then.”

But before he could ask the next question. The board went berserk. The Planchette moved from letter to letter.

“She’s sending us a message! Quick. Write down what she’s saying.” Terome said.

“You know what, you guys have fun I’ll go up to bed.” Dave said.

“But you’ll miss out on the fun bit, David.” Terome said.

Dave sighed. “Fine.” He said.

Suddenly, the Planchette stopped.

“My name is Marie Lavigne, I came to Lower Strangling from Brittany in 1675.” Eleanor said.

Dave rolled his eyes again, he was getting fed up with this.

“In 1680, I was murdered in St Gerald the Damned.” Eleanor said.

A look of horror appeared on Sarah’s, Will’s, and Eleanor’s faces.

“You don’t actually believe this do you?” Dave said. “It’s classic horror movie cliche.”

“Be quiet, Dave.” Sarah said.

“There’s more.” Eleanor said, continuing to read. “There is a church plate, eight pieces of gold, and a jar buried in the spot where I was murdered, by the alter.”

Dave sighed once more.

“I myself am buried in the churchyard. All I ask is to have a proper burial so that I can be free. Must I walk this earth forever?” Eleanor finished.

Terome placed the Ouija Board to one side.

“Finally. Let’s go to bed.” Dave said.

“No. We must free this young woman. We must go to the church and find her.” Terome said.

“At this time of night? You’re joking.” Dave said.

“You can stay here if you wish, David. The rest of us are going to the church.” Terome said.

Dave sighed.

“Fine. I’ll come. Not because I have FOMO. If you’re going I might as well come too.” Dave said.

“Great. To the church.” Terome said.

And with that, the Petersons and the Lancaster’s walked out into the night and went to the church.

“The Victorian Society is going to have something to say about this.” Dave said, as Terome broke through the concrete floor with a concrete breaker that was conveniently lying around.

“Who cares what they think?” Terome said. “All that matters is that we end this poor woman’s suffering.”

“Who’s to say that there’s any truth to this at all?” Dave said. “For all I know, you could making this stuff-”

Terome hit something, something metal.

He knelt down and picked up the thing he’d hit, a pewter plate.

“You were saying?” Sarah said.

“He could have buried that himself? I mean, how else could he have just found a concrete breaker lying around the church? I bet there’s a bag of cement somewhere.” Dave said.

“I wouldn’t put that effort in,” Terome said, picking up the eight pieces of gold that were also there. “This has been here for over 400 years.”

Dave sighed.

But then, the handle of the church door began to rattle.

Dave, Sarah, Will, Eleanor, Terome, and Esmeralda turned towards the door.

The door handle turned, then the door slowly creaked open.

Dave, Sarah, Will, Eleanor, Terome, and Esmeralda gasped as there, standing in front of them, was Simon.

“Evening, Vicar.” Terome said.

“What are you doing in here?” Simon said. He then saw the hole in the church by the alter, he gasped.

“What on Earth?! The church fabric is in a bad enough state as it is without you actively making it worse.” Simon said, hurrying over to check the damage.

“I can explain.” Terome said.

“Oh really? You better.” Simon said.

“We had a seance.” Eleanor said. “We used an Ouija Board.”

Simon looked at Eleanor in shock horror. “You what?!”

“It was my idea, Reverend.” Terome said. “I am a spiritualist. A woman was murdered here in the 17th Century. This plate and these pieces of gold were buried here, the spot where she was murdered.”

“Right.” Simon said, looking at the hole.

“She’s buried outside somewhere.” Sarah said. “I think she was just buried somewhere. She wants a proper burial.”

Simon simply looked at Esmeralda, Terome, Dave, Sarah, Will, and Eleanor.

“Well,” he said, “we better find her then. Follow me.”

So Terome, Esmeralda, Dave, Sarah, Will, and Eleanor out of the church.

After a few hours of aimless digging, a pile of bones was found by the church.

“You see, David. Everything is where it should be.” Terome said.

“You could have planned this whole thing.” Dave said.

“Trust me, I didn’t.” Terome said.

“Hmm.” Dave said.

“Right. Let’s give this skeleton a proper burial.” Simon said.

So Simon dug a rectangle hole, placed the bones carefully inside it, covered the grave up again, then performed an impromptu funeral.

“Ok. Goodnight everyone. I expect you to pay for the damage you caused to the church, Terome.” Simon said.

“Don’t worry, Vicar, I will.” Terome said. “Goodnight.”

Simon walked back off to the vicarage, and Terome, Esmeralda, Dave, Sarah, Will, and Eleanor walked back to their manor.

“All’s well that ends well,” Esmeralda said.

“I’m pretty sure it was a set up by Terome.” Dave said. “I bet Simon was in on it.”

“When are you going to accept that there might be more to this life than meets the eye?” Terome said.

“When I loose my sanity. Which is never.” Dave said.

“Hmm.” Terome said.

And so Dave, Sarah, Will, Eleanor, Esmeralda, and Terome went back to their manor and finally went to bed.

And all was right with the world.

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