John Granger and the 10PM Curfew

21:50:00; John Granger stared at his watch as the seconds came and went, oblivious to the fact that there were still people wanting a drink. “Oi, I’m waiting for a drink here!”, a man sitting at the bar yelled at John. “What? Ah yes, sorry”, John replied before pouring the man yet another pint. John’sContinue reading “John Granger and the 10PM Curfew”

The Virgin Mary Situation

The members of the Lower Strangling Village Council; Dave Peterson, John Granger, Robert Sherman, Paul Stiller, Hans Hoggunhoffer, Janet Foster, Bruce Richardson, and Simon Abernathy, were once again sitting in the Village Hall, albeit in a much wider circle with each councillor two meters apart. “Right, I think everyone is here. Shall we begin theContinue reading “The Virgin Mary Situation”

Dave Returns to Work

Hearing an alarm. Sleepily turning off said alarm. Having a shower. Putting on a tie. Brushing your teeth. Having breakfast whilst listening to Radio Two. Saying goodbye to the wife. Dropping the kids off at school. Driving to the train station. Buying a ticket to London. Boarding said train to London. Sitting in train forContinue reading “Dave Returns to Work”

Things Return to Normal(ish)

It was early September, and it seemed everything was finally going back to normal after the Covid-19 lockdown. Will and Eleanor were back at Warwick Prep (much to their parents relief), Dave was back in London working for Banana when he wasn’t in Pret, Simon was back preaching in St Gerald the Damned to aContinue reading “Things Return to Normal(ish)”

A Trip to the Zoo

The Petersons decided to go back to Lower Strangling from Eastbourne via Longleat Safari Park. Sure, it added another 3 hours to their journey, but they weren’t in any hurray. Will and Eleanor weren’t expected back at school until the following week, and Dave was not expected back at work until the following week either.Continue reading “A Trip to the Zoo”

Prospects on the Beach

“Blimey, this A Level fiasco isn’t particularly good is it? Judging kids on their background and not on their academic achievement”, Dave said whilst looking at his phone. The Petersons were on their first holiday of the year visiting Dave’s parents in their house near Rye in East Sussex. They themselves were staying in aContinue reading “Prospects on the Beach”

Rev. Abernathy or: How I Learned to Start Worrying and Hate the Bomb

The villagers of Lower Strangling stood around the War Memorial once again just as they did three months earlier, but this time to remember VJ Day; the day the entire Second World War actually ended. “Today we celebrate the end of the worst war in human history, but we also remember specifically the soldiers fromContinue reading “Rev. Abernathy or: How I Learned to Start Worrying and Hate the Bomb”

The Curious Tale of Patrick O’Brien

For meat magnate Patrick O’Brien, the COVID-19 lockdown was actually beneficiary, for he needed to remain hidden from the prying eyes of the media, the public, and, most importantly, Stuart Kennedy and Warwickshire Police. Patrick O’Brien ran the most successful meat business in England; Paddy O’Brien’s. He had several meat processing factories and abattoirs acrossContinue reading “The Curious Tale of Patrick O’Brien”

Conversations in the Hangman’s Noose

“It’s crazy, all these people in masks. You would have thought we were in the middle of a pandemic,” said one of the first few visitors to Lower Strangling to have a pint in the Hangman’s Noose since March. “Well, that’s because we are”, replied John, the publican, as he poured another pint of ThrockmortonContinue reading “Conversations in the Hangman’s Noose”

The Miserables

Early morning in Leamington Spa and The Parade was blocked off, not to ensure Social Distancing measures could be followed, but because the entire contents of Lee Longlands was sprawled out in a pile in the middle of the road; like a barricade. On top of the barricade and behind it, were several disgruntled actorsContinue reading “The Miserables”